May 20, 2007 | 12:37 am
Grandma’s Round Table
Almost every Sunday for years, my Grandma’s round table was the hub of my entire family. Aunts, uncles, cousins, and family friends all found a home at the table underneath the stained glass lampshade Grandma had made. The table itself was made up of rocks that her parents had hounded in Eastern Oregon decades before. And on the table was Grandma’s rotary phone, paper to doodle on, and a collection of bills, catalogs, cards, and letters.
Discussions around the table were always exciting to me. I learned about careers, relationships, family history, hopes and dreams. IÂ experienced univeral qualities of love. I developed my personal feelings on politics and socio-economic issues. Just about every topic was open for discussion.
The cast of characters itself was always changing. One of my favorites was a friend of my grandma’s who was a vaudvillian performer who used to tell me about traveling with shows. One day Ron Wyden, now US Senator, came by to talk to my Grandma about getting her vote for office. My Grandma had adopted the Romanian immigrant family that lived across the street and they would often come by to say hi, and leave some freshly cooked meal.
There was no reservation needed at Grandma’s Round Table. If all the seats were already taken, you could just grab an extra chair out of the back bedroom, or start another conversation on the sofa. Sometimes, spontaneously, the entire family would be together. This could easily become lunch or dinner when someone went to pick up a bucket of chicken or order a pizza.
Sitting at the table, Grandma was always quick to dish out wisdom or a funny joke. She was quick to stand for what she believed in, discussing politics at a local mall or helping raise money for a local charity. And the whole family was behind her - not because they had to be, but because she had given out so much that everyone wanted to support her, be with her, love her.
Grandma’s been gone for a few years. The family has grown and I now have five wonderful nieces and nephews. We all still get together a few times a year. And there won’t be a replacement to Grandma’s Round Table.
Next weekend for Memorial Day I’ll be visiting the family cemetery where my grandma and grandpa, great-grandparents, great-great-grandparents, great uncle, and other family and friends are located. I’ll bring my heart, my love, and a soft-bristle brush to clean off the marble markers. But most of all, I’ll bring my memories of Grandma’s Round Table where I learned about life, love, and family.
Homework:
First, where is your round table? Do you have a space where you, friends, and family can come together and chat, eat, and connect? If yes, fantastic - how do you acknowledge yourself and express gratitude for that gift? If no, would you like to create one?
Second, take a lesson from my Grandma. She may have said things that weren’t what we wanted or even needed to hear - she was human after all. Yet my Grandma’s actions were all love. Every action my Grandma took showed me the depth, breadth, and full extent of her love. Do something today to love yourself. I assure you, you will receive the gift of love in return.
Truly Yours,
Joseph Lyons
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