Jan 14, 2008 | 9:37 pm
How’m I doin?
Recently I asked a trusted advisor for the truth about me. Really give me the low down. Bring it -Â I can stomach it. And the big thing is, I want to know all about myself.
What I got was one simple word that crumbled my psyche. I won’t tell you what the word is, because that doesn’t matter. Let’s just say it’s a word that triggered some of my deepest fears about myself. Sticks and stones my break my bones, but words can break who I am.
So, I’ve acknowledged all the feelings that have resulted, I’ve allowed some time to process, and now I get to decide what my commitment is. What do I want to do with this new realization about myself? Here’s some options – which sounds most like you?
- Tell the trusted advisor where they can stick it
- Get into a fight (fight or flight is no surprise)
- Be so afraid of ever being called that word again that I just shut down
- Assume that this word is me and really own this negative trait (I can’t tell you how many self-described “bitches” I’ve met)
- Jump for glee that I know this new thing about me
- Quietly and patiently integrate the deeper lesson from the experience
- Ask for support and guidance from additional trusted advisors
- Ask for clarification from the original source (getting into risky territory here)
- Allow myself to fully express my feelings and thoughts with complete vulnerability to my advisor (this is where I really change, part of me dies, and I grow)
So, I did the last four items naturally. It’s a part of who I am and how I process. I’ve honestly changed the way I think, feel, and respond to fear.
Sticks, stones, names, words. They all have the capacity to hurt. What a great opportunity to see how you’ve grown. What a fantastic way to continue growing.
Got a coach?
Truly Yours,
Joseph Lyons